For all the noobs – John Oliver did a segment on Bitcoin and Cryptocurrencies

Mr. John Oliver, the host of Last Week Tonight has dedicated a small segment for all the crypto-noobs across the globe. He even vents out on how annoyed and pissed off he is at Dan, a self-proclaimed crypto expert who he works along with.

John starts off the show by claiming that technology will make television so high definition that he will no longer be allowed to appear on it. He proclaims to start the show carefully because according to him discussions on any new technology tend to age very badly {plays an old video regarding how a guy claims that Google glass is going to be the next shitz}

To which John says,

“Because some people don’t mind doing this {looking at an imaginary device in this hand} if the alternative was wearing a stupid robot on their face all day along.”

And adds how dangerous it is to make predictions about where technology is going.

He then starts off with the hot topic of the day, Bitcoin, Blockchain and Cryptocurrencies, and says,

“Everything you don’t understand about money combined with everything you don’t understand about technology.” {looks like the god is speaking to us}

He attempts to educate all the noobs right from the start about the main cryptocurrency, Bitcoin, on how it’s all over the news ever since the value exploded last year from around a thousand dollars to nearly $9000 by November 2017 and over $20,000 by December.

He even plays a video to prove by pointing out at how even the paparazzi has started to ask celebrities about Bitcoin. In the video, a paparazzi asks Micheal Keaton, who walks out of a restaurant after a nice dine with his friends.

The video goes like:

Paparazzi dude: Hey, would you recommend buying Bitcoin?

MK: You know whats funny? I was just talking to my buddy about that, who knows about this. I got two different – one guy said, “Yeah! you should probably want to.” Another friend of mine said, “Ehhhh!” {MK realizing this might end up in a bad way continues to say} Not like it’s a bad thing, they just don’t know where it’s gonna go.

According to him, this a dramatic shift because not long ago, Bitcoin was heard from only one guy in the office who wouldn’t shut up about it. He named ‘that guy’ Dan because Dan is the exact same guy in his office who’s been annoying everyone with the “You gotta get into Bitcoin” shit. {Poor Dan}

He says that lately more and more people, local people or wrong Dan’s have been getting into cryptocurrencies because of all the buzz it’s having around the globe {plays a video on how a guy sitting near a ‘swamp log’ in North Florida became a millionaire at the age of 24 by investing in Bitcoin.}

He further adds that there’s a cryptocurrency FOMO going on despite the fact that Bitcoin has dropped by nearly a half since the start of this year.

He then introduces Bitcoin exactly how its explained in Bitcoin Wikipedia page and even has a guy wearing a Bitcoin costume explaining the same. This according to him is the newest and accurate explanation of a complex topic to be delivered.

The man in a stupid costume says,

“I’m a virtual currency, worldwide you could send with a little or no fees; open source; not controlled by any government, corporate or individual. It’s financial freedom bro!”

He explains more on how to make money through Bitcoin through Dan’s perspective, which is,

“You just trade it on exchanges like any other money”

If asked, how does it value? Dan’s reply would be:

“How does any money have value man!”

John even agrees with Dan’s reply and stated that the fundamental reason that Bitcoin has value is that people agreed that it has value. He compares Bitcoin with Beanie babies which is currently priced at a whopping $15,000 only because the owner thinks someone will pay that much for it. {Showcases his own beanie baby and proves the audience right}

He then presumes to play a video where Michael Casey, a blockchain expert who says,

“The key point here is that, this is a distributed ledger, there’s no central server, all the other ledgers that we have, all banking ledgers or company ledgers, they all sit and reside inside that company, which means they have one point of attack, they can be hacked – JP Morgan was hacked by the cyber thieves not so long ago, Home Depot, Target, we had all these companies get hacked because this one centre controls all the information. The Bitcoin resides on thousands of computers, you cant hack that.”

To which John adds:

“When you think about it that sounds great, and because of the complicated process network uses to verify records, it is very secure. Now relax! I’m not going to get into all that programming process or how it works but I will share a really helpful, really dumb metaphor for it is safe.”

Don Tapscott, co-founder of Blockchain Research Institute,

“The way that I think of it, a blockchain is a highly processed thing. Sort of like a chicken Mcnugget and if you wanted to hack it, it would be like turning the chicken Mcnugget back to a chicken. Now someday, someone will be able to do that. But for now, its going to be tough.”

He even talks about the popularity for the very term ‘Blockchain’ on his show and the statics on how existing companies who added the word blockchain in their name saw an average of more than threefold increase in their stokes by taking the example of ‘Long Island Ice Tea’ who renamed themselves to ‘Long Blockchain Corp.’ which led to a huge increase in their stocks.

To which he added:

“I don’t care how stupid it is, it clearly worked, that is why from now on, this show will be called Last Bit Tonight with Block Chainiver, thripple the rating, tripple, take that to the bank.”

When he starts off with what other cryptocurrencies are, he says,

“Okay… well the key software to create a coin is an open source. Just about anyone can create one. So they have done that. There are now over 1500 cryptocurrencies that you can buy with names like Titcoin, Trump Coin, Jesus Coin, Electroneum, Particl, Deep Onion, Pluton and Clam, a list so exciting that you can’t tell which one is real and which are made up because they’re all real. I didn’t make any up, I tried to come up with a dumber name than deep onion and it just cant be done.”

He adds:

“Not all of these coins are like Bitcoins, just hoping to be the next currency often times, start-up companies will sell a coin to try to raise up money as an alternative to issuing a stock and sometimes those coins are meant tokens to be used as showbiz a start-up might eventually provide, kind of like the tokens at chucky cheese only virtual and not redeemable at a rats based food emporium. It has become incredibly easy to issue coins, so companies are doing it a lot. ICO or intial coin offering raised over 6 billion dollars in 2017 with one company raising over 35 million under 30 seconds.”

John even talks about how people don’t pay attention to all the details before buying the ICO and how they are just responding to FOMO which is spread across the internet. He calls it a cult-like devotion formed by Youtube personalities and Reddit users.

Along with this, John covers all the mainstream terms and events taking place in the crypto-space. He agrees that digital currency and blockchain technology can lead to safer, secure and easy future but at the same time, warns all the noobs to think before they make a move in the crypto-world and everything related with it.

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